Flood
Plot Synopsis: When London is flooded. Del and Rodney along with Trigger, Denzil and Boycie are forced to stay in the Nag’s Head as they have been locked it. They have to wait until the flood clears up. Rodney proceeds to worry about Albert throughout the flood, which gets on Del’s nerves. Also Del get’s fed up with listening to Mike’s whining about the flood.
Takes place after Hole In One.
*OPENING CREDITS*
INT – TROTTER’S FLAT – LUNCH TIME.
It’s Lunch Time. Del is sat at the table complaining about how bad business has been. Rodney is also sat at the table, looking like a zombie, sick of Del’s complaining. Albert is sat at the chair asleep.
DEL. I just don’t understand it, really I don’t..
RODNEY. Umm..
DEL. Those suits are the best on the market right now. Also I’m giving them away dirt cheap, yet nobody will buy ’em.
RODNEY. Del, I don’t wanna’ upset you or anything, but those suits are disgusting.
DEL. Thankyou, Rodney. Thanks for all your help. Why don’t you just shut up ey?
RODNEY. Why don’t you shut up, whining and whining about your flaming suits.
DEL. Been raining all bloody morning, you comin’ down the nag’s head soon?
RODNEY. Yeah, I’ll come for a pint.
DEL. HEY UNC!..UNC.
UNCLE ALBERT. Whaa?
DEL. Wanna’ come down the Nag’s Head later?
UNCLE ALBERT. NO!
DEL. Good. Wasn’t gonna’ take you anyway.
INT – NAG’S HEAD – LATER ON IN THE DAY.
Boycie is sat at the table discussing the weather with Denzil. Soon after Del and Rodney come in the Nag’s Head.
DENZIL. How’s things Boyce?
BOYCIE. Uh. The same Denzil, the wife keeps going on and on at me. With this and that. Why I came down here.
DENZIL. Heha. Weather is terrible ain’t it.
BOYCIE. Yeahh.
Del and Rodney walk in.
DEL. ALRIGHT BOYCIE, DENZIL?! WANNA’ DRINK?
They both nod, Rodney goes to sit at the table. We can see Del in the background ordering the drinks.
DENZIL. Alright Rodney?
RODNEY. Yeah, am fine Denzil. Just sick of this weather.
DENZIL. Me too.
DEL. Here you go lads, got you a pint Rodney.
RODNEY. Cheers.
DEL. Better get back to the flat soon Rodney. Looked pretty deep before we came in.
RODNEY. Umm.
INT – NAG’S HEAD – NIGHT.
Del and Rodney, Trigger, Denzil and Boycie. Are sat at the table.
DEL. Seeya everybody. We better get back Rodney. Oh and Trig. I’ll have that suit for you by Thursday.
TRIGGER. Cheers Del.
Del and Rodney walk up to the main door, and it’s closed. They confront Mike.
DEL. Ey Mike, why is that door shut?
MIKE. Have you had a look outside?
Del peers out of the window. He jumps back in shock.
DEL. Bloody ell. Look out there Rodney.
RODNEY. It’s flaming flooded, Del. Look at that man out there, look where it’s up to on him.
DEL. Let me have a look.
Boycie comes up.
BOYCIE. What’s going on?
DEL. Flooded.
BOYCIE. You’ve gotta be jokin’ me.
Mike makes an announcement.
MIKE. Due to the terrible conditions of the weather, I’ve had to lock the pub. It’s unsafe for people to be out there, according to the news. Looks like you’ll have to stay here.
DEL. Come on Mike. I don’t care if it’s unsafe.
MIKE. I can’t Del. It’s the rules.
DEL. The news is a bunch of old pony any way.
MIKE. Sorry Mate, can’t.
DEL. Oh for..
INT – NAG’S HEAD – MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
People who have been locked in the Nag’s head are asleep. Del and Rodney are still awake.
DEL. Can you sleep Rodney?
RODNEY. No, these seats are horrible. Can’t stop worrying about Albert.
DEL. He’ll be fine. I’m sick of Mike, prancing up and down, I can’t get to sleep. (Whispers Loudly) MIKE! Will you sit down, you’re getting on my nerves.
MIKE. I’m worried Del.
DEL. Don’t be.
BOYCIE. What time is it?
DEL. Half past three.
BOYCIE. Can’t sleep. Wish Marlene had come down tonight and not me.
DEL. Quit your moaning Boycie..Rodney, Albert is probably sat enjoying the fact we’re away, with a brandy. We’ll get back and he’ll be passed out on the seat. With the TV’s on.
INT – NAG’S HEAD – MORNING.
Del and Rodney wake up. For the most part everyone else is awake apart from Trigger.
DEL. Argh, I actually got asleep. YOU UP Rodney?
RODNEY. Well I am now.
DEL. Trigger’s still passed out, bless ’em. TRIGGER.
TRIGGER. Yes Del?
DEL. Nothing. Morning.
MIKE. For the most part, the people have been out and it is safe to return home.
DEL. Finally.
INT – TROTTER’S FLAT – MORNING.
Del and Rodney walk in. Water marks can be seen up to their knees.
DEL. Can’t believe we had to walk all the way from the Nag’s Head.
RODNEY. Well the Van was stuck.
DEL. Yes, thankyou Captain Obvious. Where is the seaman?
RODNEY. Don’t know.
Albert suddenly comes in singing from the hall.
UNCLE ALBERT. Alright Boys. Nice night?
DEL. Don’t get cheeky Albert, not in the mood. Wait a minute where did you sleep?
UNCLE ALBERT. In your room. Well you weren’t here, and you have a better bed.
DEL. Cheeky get. Ey and where’s most of the Alcohol gone?
UNCLE ALBERT. I don’t know, why you looking at me? Want some breakfast.
DEL AND RODNEY. Oh yeah.
Del and Rodney sit at the table. Albert goes into the kitchen.
RODNEY. WHAT..A..NIGHT.
DEL. Tell me about it. Whiny Mike didn’t help either. He was getting on my nerves all night, walking up and down.
Rodney goes to look out the window.
RODNEY. They’re cleaning up the roads now. We should be able to get down the market soon.
DEL. Good. We’re skint.
RODNEY. Well hope we have some better stock. Those suits are not going to sell.
Del Sighs.
*END CREDITS*
The only element of the script I liked was the idea of all the main characters being locked up in the Nags Head.
There were no funny lines, no sub-plots and not really an actual outcome.
I was expecting Albert to come and rescue everyone in a little dingy boat which would have been hilarious.
Add some more meat in that script, add some more purpose and you’ve got yourself a better script. Nice try mate.
Please don’t take my critism personally (I obviously don’t know you) I’ve produced a couple of Fools scripts on here years ago, and I don’t even want to read them anylonger. Shockingly awful, at the time – I thought they were pretty good! I was about 16 or 17 mind. Now I’m 25, I’m still trying to pen a script of my own, but just won’t happen.
I just think if you added more writing, couple of one liners etc, you’d have the makings of a funny script. The tone was right etc.
Thanks, I don’t take any criticism personally. I take it in and consider it for the future.
I’m going to continue to write scripts and improve on them.
Nice try, but were there any jokes in there? It would last about three minutes! I’m not knocking, but come on!
Yes there was jokes in there. But I guess it’s what you find funny. Thanks for the comment though, much appreciated. Can you give me any advice for a next script?
Nice effort but each part sounds like previous episodes. An all nighter at the Nags Head would be an ideal script though. Good work
Thanks for the kind words and advice. :)