{"id":1339,"date":"2010-01-15T15:16:29","date_gmt":"2010-01-15T15:16:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/?p=1339"},"modified":"2010-01-15T15:16:29","modified_gmt":"2010-01-15T15:16:29","slug":"grandad-v-albert","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/grandad-v-albert\/","title":{"rendered":"Grandad V Albert"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n\r\n<\/amp-auto-ads>\n<\/div>\n

GRANDAD V ALBERT<\/h2>\n

(Who was the best \u2018soppy old duffer\u2019?)<\/h2>\n

Throughout history there have been many epic battles that divide opinion almost 50\/50.<\/p>\n

Coke v Pepsi, KFC v McDonalds, Asda v Tesco, and of course Kramer v Kramer to name but a few.<\/p>\n

Well would you Adam and Eve it? It\u2019s time to ponder the question that makes all of those examples listed above seem like, well like Poulet Nuevo, as the French would say.<\/p>\n

First let\u2019s take a look at the tale of the tape\u2026..<\/p>\n

\"GRANDAD<\/a>

Ted \u2018Grandad\u2019 Trotter V Albert Gladstone Trotter<\/p><\/div>\n

NAME: Ted \u2018Grandad\u2019 Trotter<\/h3>\n

NICKNAMES: other than \u2018daft old git\u2019 and words to that effect, none.<\/p>\n

AGE: Unknown but rumour has it the Turin Shroud is the only item of clothing older than his vest.<\/p>\n

NUMBER OF APPEARANCES: 22 episodes from Series 1-3 (did not appear in Cash & Curry)<\/p>\n

BEST LINES: \u201cWell I\u2019d have to think twice\u201d Del claims Rodney\u2019s new 40 year old girlfriend is too old for even him, Grandad agrees.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat you got Rodney, a Wendy House\u201d? Grandad gives Rodney\u2019s new business venture, the self-catering holiday trade, all his encouragement<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was 18, he pretended he was 14\u201d Grandad tells a story about how young lads were pretending to be 18 in order to fight in the war, when he claims his Brother George\u00a0 lied about his age Rodney wrongly assumes he pretended to be 18.<\/p>\n

GREATEST MOMENT: \u2018IT\u2019S COMING DELBOY\u2019 – Unbolting the wrong chandelier in \u2018a Touch of Glass\u2019<\/p>\n

And onto his opponent\u2026.<\/p>\n

NAME: Albert Gladstone Trotter<\/h3>\n

NICKNAMES: Boomerang Trotter, The Ferret, Captain Birdseye, The old man of the sea, Sinbad, Jonah.<\/p>\n

AGE: Again unknown but Henry VIII was said to be a big fan of his beard.<\/p>\n

NUMBER OF APPEARANCES: 35 episodes from Series 4-7 & 12 Christmas Specials (Did not appear in series 4 episode \u2018Happy Returns\u2019 or the Christmas Specials \u2018If the could see us now\u2019, \u2018Strangers on the Shore\u2019 or \u2018Sleepless in Peckham\u2019 (the latter 3 due to actor Buster Merryfield’s death in 1999)<\/p>\n

BEST LINES: \u201cThey tried to get me on Naval technicalities like, err, err, it was broad daylight\u201d<\/p>\n

Albert fails with his defence of \u201cIt wasn\u2019t showing any light\u201d when court marshalled for ruining a perfectly good aircraft carrier by ramming it with his boat.<\/p>\n

\u201cI wasn\u2019t going to say during the war, bloody little know-all\u2026\u2026during the 1939-1945 conflict with Germany\u201d said after a Del warns him not to say \u2018during the war\u2019 again.<\/p>\n

\u201cWho\u2019s Rachel\u201d Albert fails to grasp that Raquel is only a stage name.<\/p>\n

GREATEST MOMENT: URGHH A GIRL! Cocking up \u2018acting shocked\u2019 that Rodney is taking out a girl in the Episode \u2018Rodney Come Home\u2019.<\/p>\n

So that\u2019s the contenders looked at now onto the serious stuff.<\/p>\n

\u201cAn out of work lamplighter waiting for gas to make a comeback\u201d<\/strong><\/h3>\n

a line that perfectly sums up Grandad Trotter, it\u2019s not that he\u2019s lazy it\u2019s more that he\u2019s been there, done that and got the (stained) T-shirt to prove it. As long as he\u2019s got a tenner for a bet and his two tellies then he\u2019s happy as a sandboy.<\/p>\n

Albert on the other hand is always on the go, he likes Dominos (sometimes even the Ninja variety) Piano playing (badly), a spot of singing, he was a member of the over 60s club and despite his advancing years and unlike Grandad, he still hard an eye for the ladies.<\/p>

\n