{"id":4030,"date":"2012-06-07T09:38:00","date_gmt":"2012-06-07T08:38:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/?p=4030"},"modified":"2012-06-04T09:56:50","modified_gmt":"2012-06-04T08:56:50","slug":"only-fools-fan-script-broke-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/only-fools-fan-script-broke-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Only Fools Fan Script – Broke – 2"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Continuing from yesterday<\/a> we pick up part 2 of Only Fools Fan Kiel Phillips presents a superb script called Broke circa series 2<\/p>\n

Only Fools fan script – Broke – Part 2<\/h2>\n

SCENE 2 – FLAT – EVENING<\/strong><\/p>\n

GRANDAD IS SITTING WATCHING HIS TWO TVS IN HIS USUAL SPOT, DEL AND RODNEY ENTER BOTH LOOKING OUT OF BREATH.<\/p>\n

DEL: I tell you what, i can’t wait to get petrol in the van again. Come on Rodney you lazy little plonker, put down that suitcase and get the kettle on. Alright there Grandad.<\/p>\n

GRANDAD: Not too bad, business any better today Del Boy?<\/p>\n

DEL: Worse if you’d believe it. Come on Rodney, hurry up, I’m parched.<\/p>\n

RODNEY: I don’t know how, you drank my tea<\/p>\n

DEL: It’s a long walk ain’t it? Anyway it was getting cold, we can’t afford to be wasteful. Would you like a cup grandad?<\/p>\n

GRANDAD: There’s no milk<\/p>\n

DEL: That’s not a problem, we can have it without<\/p>\n

GRANDAD: No teabags either<\/p>\n

DEL: Gordon Bennet, leave the tea Rodney, sit down. Blimey we’ve been skint before but I’ve never known it this bad. I tell you, I’m not coming home tomorrow until that suitcase is empty<\/p>\n

GRANDAD: Where are you taking it Del, downtown Tokyo?<\/p>\n

\"Only<\/p>\n

DEL: You saucy old git. No there has to be a way to sell these, i just have to change my sales pitch.<\/p>\n

RODNEY: What if… no you’ll think it’s stupid<\/p>\n

DEL: No, no i won’t, what is it Rodney?<\/p>\n

RODNEY: Right, what if we don’t tell the punters that they’re Chinese<\/p>\n

DEL: Don’t be so bloody stupid you wallybrain. They’re going to know we’re lying to them when we do a demonstration<\/p>\n

RODNEY: But what if we don’t do a demonstration<\/p>\n

DEL: But they’re going to want to see that they work ain’t they<\/p>\n

RODNEY: What if we tell them that the reason they are so cheap is because the batteries aren’t included, we can easily take them out.<\/p>\n

DEL: No, we can’t con the punters, if we do they’ll never buy anything from us again<\/p>\n

RODNEY: Del, when someone buys something from us they never buy anything again anyway<\/p>\n

DEL: No, it’s not right, you know me, i like to be straight in business, not do anything dodgy. Keep it all above board, that’s my motto.<\/p>\n

RODNEY AND GRANDAD REACT<\/p>\n

GRANDAD: How did you get lumbered with them anyway?<\/p>\n

DEL: Well, i was a bit worse for wear in the Nags Head and it sounded like a good deal. \u00a0300 kids learning toys at a nicker a piece, i thought they’d fly out of the case.<\/p>\n

RODNEY: Who did you buy them off?<\/p>\n

DEL: Trigger<\/p>

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