{"id":6619,"date":"2017-03-15T16:51:02","date_gmt":"2017-03-15T16:51:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/?p=6619"},"modified":"2017-03-15T17:28:34","modified_gmt":"2017-03-15T17:28:34","slug":"bells-peckham-part-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/bells-peckham-part-3\/","title":{"rendered":"The Bells of Peckham part 3"},"content":{"rendered":"
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The Bells of Peckham
\nby Gary Stocker & Paul Stocker<\/p>\n

…Continued from yesterdays script the\u00a0The Bells of Peckham part\u00a02<\/a><\/p>\n

scenes 10\u00a0to\u00a014<\/p>\n

ONLY FOOLS AND HORSES<\/p>\n

INT. CASSANDRA\u2019S BANK \u2013 OUTSIDE INTERVIEW ROOM – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n

Cassandra is sitting nervously outside an interview room which is made of perspex glass. Inside the room are two of the bank bigwigs, (50’s) very stern and foreboding. These are the interviewers. One of them gets up and goes to the door.<\/p>\n

INTERVIEWER # 1<\/p>\n

(coughs)<\/p>\n

Er. Mrs Trotter, please.<\/p>\n

Cassandra stands, straightens her skirt, swallows and follows the interviewer into the room.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

INT. CASSANDRA’S BANK – INTERVIEW ROOM – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n

The room is bright and clear. There is a large board room like table in the centre. The two interviewers have their backs to the door. Cassandra sits opposite them.<\/p>\n

INTERVIEWER # 1<\/p>\n

So, Mrs Trotter. Or can I call you Cassandra?<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA<\/p>\n

Please do.<\/p>\n

INTERVIEWER # 1<\/p>\n

This is Roger Batton, Branch manager from Thames Ditton and I’m Jeff Quinton, London regional manager. Now, Cassandra, you’ve been with the firm for twenty-eight years, which is commendable in itself. This is your third interview for Branch Manager. Could you tell me why you think you were looked over those last two times.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA<\/p>\n

(confidently)<\/p>\n

To tell you the truth I thought I was ready for the responsibility but in hindsight…<\/p>\n

Cassandra spots a man carrying a load of toilet rolls into the outside office and places them against the perspex wall.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

…um … in hindsight.. I didn’t have the experience in certain aspects of banking which were required. I have identified those areas and…<\/p>\n

A different man brings another load of toilet rolls and places them against the perspex wall.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

…and …and I have purposely trained with the intention of obtaining the branch manager position.<\/p>\n

CU of Cassandra’s face as she is talking – The more loads of toilet rolls that are placed against the wall makes the light on her face fade darker and darker.<\/p>\n

INTERVIEWER #2<\/p>\n

That’s very commendable Mrs Trotter, I mean Cassandra. Please, tell me, in you own words, if you will, why we should consider your application this time.<\/p>\n

Cassandra is zoning out on the toilet rolls.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA<\/p>\n

Sorry… Um. My application. Yes. Well, I have matured these last few years and have take a careful and considered approach to every detail in my current branch…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

INT. Cassandra’s bank – outside interview room – day<\/strong><\/p>\n

A man in overalls brings the last handful of toilet rolls and places them against the wall. He turns to the secretary.<\/p>\n

DENZIL’S MATE<\/p>\n

That’s yer lot, love. See yah.<\/p>\n

The secretary looks staggered. The door to the interview room opens and out walks Cassandra, and both the interviewers. All three look at the huge pile of toilet tissue, then the interviewers look at Cassandra.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA<\/p>\n

We had a bout of dysentery in the office. Thought it best to make sure supplies were topped up.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Never<\/p>\n

INT. VAN \u2013 DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n

Rodney is still driving the van. The mobile goes and “The Boss” comes up on the screen.<\/p>\n

RODNEY<\/p>\n

Hello Cass.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA<\/p>\n

You Bastard. You absolute…<\/p>\n

The Spicegirls song kicks in.<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

…all in the office. It ruined my interview. You are a complete…<\/p>\n

The song kicks in again…<\/p>\n

CASSANDRA (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

…Out of my life you…<\/p>\n

And once more…<\/p>\n

Rodney takes the ear piece out as though he is scared of it and places it on the seat.<\/p>\n

RODNEY<\/p>\n

(to the earpiece)<\/p>\n

Cass… Sweetness… Can we talk about whatever it is that’s upset you when I get home? Love?<\/p>\n

Rodney turns it off and continues driving.<\/p>\n

RODNEY(CONT’D)<\/p>\n

What have I done, now?<\/p>\n

(then realises)<\/p>\n

What has Denzil done, now?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

INT. THE NAGS HEAD – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n

Del and Damien are sat at the bar. SHARON the new Landlady, early 40’s, tight top and lots of cleavage, has just given them their drinks. They look like they are staring at other punters.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Blimey, Dad. Don’t think much of that old thing. Bit flea bitten ain’t it?<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Dunno. Looks alright to me, son.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Don’t look real to me.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Looks fairly real to me, boy.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Looks like something you’d find stuffed.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

If you say so, Damie.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Dad? Are you listening? I’m talking about your coat.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Hey. Your mum bought that, didn’t she. She used to have a good eye for fashion but I think her old mince pies are going. You know what I mean, son?<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Where in gods name did she buy that from? A Cattery?<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

No. She bought it off you.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Oh? Must have been what Uncle Rod bought the other week. He said they were persian rugs.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

They probably used to be.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Dad. It’s because of Uncle Rod I asked you to come here.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Is it? What’s up, son?<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

It’s… erm…<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Come on. You can tell me. I’m ya dad ain’t I. If you can’t confide in me who can ya?<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

Yeah but…<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

What is it?<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

It’s purely confidential, yeah?<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

Sure.<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

But you said that when I told you Donna was pregnant.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

And?<\/p>\n

DAMIEN<\/p>\n

And? And? You may as well have puit an avert in the Peckham Echo.<\/p>\n

DEL<\/p>\n

(caught out)<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Sorry Damie. But keeping a secret has never been a Trotter trait. Forget that, anyway. What is it you wanted to talk about?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    DAMIEN<\/p>\n

    Rodney.<\/p>\n

    DEL<\/p>\n

    I gathered that. What about him?<\/p>\n

    DAMIEN<\/p>

    \n