{"id":984,"date":"2010-01-04T20:29:32","date_gmt":"2010-01-04T20:29:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ofah.webhostingireland.ie\/blog\/?p=984"},"modified":"2017-02-10T12:56:44","modified_gmt":"2017-02-10T12:56:44","slug":"up-there-for-thinking-prequel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/","title":{"rendered":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"d7386eeb5bdcd2f43c1295b58ceaf130\" data-index=\"3\" style=\"float: right; margin:5px 0 5px 5px;\">\n<amp-auto-ads type=\"adsense\"\r\n              data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-1609637348681190\">\r\n<\/amp-auto-ads>\n<\/div>\n<h2><strong>Prequal &#8211; Up there for thinking<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/docs\/up%20there%20for%20thinking.doc\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\" border=\"0\" alt=\"\" width=\"25\" height=\"24\" \/> Download Script (63K)<\/a><\/p>\n<p>EXT Morning &#8211; Martin Luther King Comprehensive<\/p>\n<p>A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school uniform (complete with cap) is strolling into the school gates. He whistles carelessly as he goes.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. (Looks at watch) Ten past nine! Looks like Bendover-Benson for you Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Give us a break Boycie, you wouldn&#8217;t want to get a mate in trouble would ya?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Not a mate, no Del-boy. Haahahahaha<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You&#8217;ve been bloody unbearable since they made you a prefect. Come on, I sorted you out with your French homework the other day didn&#8217;t I?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes  Del, we did the detention together, remember!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh yes, sorry Boyce. You know, it&#8217;s amazing how he twigged that I did yours.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It was most probably the fact that we were the only two in the whole class that translated the English phrase, &#8220;Which is the way to the beach?&#8221; into the French phrase, &#8220;Twenty untipped cigarettes, please.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Yeah, I got a bit confused with me verbs.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well I can think of a few verbs regarding the episode. And one or two adjectives as well!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Eh?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No, never mind. Go on then, in you go. But you owe me one. Right?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0Bloody hell you&#8217;re worse than The Driscoll brothers.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ah, speaking of who, I heard they were on the look-out for you.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, not again, what the hell do they want from me this time?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well I don&#8217;t know. I only heard they were looking. You ain&#8217;t flogged them any of those colour television kits you were selling have you?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No! Anyway, what if I did? There was nothing wrong with them.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Del, they were just a bit of clear plastic &#8211; half blue and half green.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, that&#8217;s how they work, you put it over your TV. It&#8217;s the sky and the grass &#8211; see?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hardly colour! And not much good when you&#8217;re watching something that&#8217;s set indoors!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Nobody&#8217;s complained.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Has anyone bought one?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I&#8217;ve sold a few. And Trigger bought two!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I&#8217;m surprised he&#8217;d even bother to buy one, let alone two.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Why not?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Because his mum and Dad don&#8217;t even own a television set. That&#8217;s why not.<\/p>\n<p>As Boycie shakes his head in disbelief, Denzil approaches.<\/p>\n<p>Denzil:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hey, you, this colour television kit you sold me is a load of rubbish. It&#8217;s just a bit of coloured plastic.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hahahahahaha!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 (Ignores Boycie) Sorry, do I know you? You must have made a mistake.<\/p>\n<p>Denzil:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes, you do. I&#8217;m the fool that brought this rubbish off you last week for half a crown. And don&#8217;t pretend you don&#8217;t know me, how many other black scousers have you met?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ah, yes, of course, now I remember you. Hazel.<\/p>\n<p>Denzil:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It&#8217;s Denzil. And I want my money back.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No, no, no, no, no Denzil, very sorry, no can do. But! You&#8217;re in luck, I&#8217;m doing a very good line in T-Shirts. All the way from America! As it&#8217;s you and you weren&#8217;t 100% happy with the wonderful TV colour kit, let&#8217;s call it just the two bob. Can&#8217;t say fairer than that.<\/p>\n<p>Denzil:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Two bob? How good are they.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Top quality Denz, American!<\/p>\n<p>Denzil:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 American? Alright then, go on I&#8217;ll take one. Cheers Del.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Excellent Denzil, I&#8217;ll drop it in for you tomorrow. Have your money ready first break.<\/p>\n<p>Denzil nods and leaves happily.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 What American T-Shirts are they then? Not the ones with &#8216;Go President Nixon&#8217; on the front.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes, they&#8217;re the ones.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But say he don&#8217;t win the election.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Course he will. They&#8217;re not going to put some Irish bloke in charge of the country are they! Honestly, &#8216;Kennedy&#8217;! He&#8217;s not gonna win is he. Load of rubbish, give it six months and nobody will have ever heard of him. No, Nixon&#8217;s the boy.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But who wants a shirt with the American president on? This is Peckham!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But it&#8217;s foreign and mysterious Boycie. And &#8216;American&#8217; just sounds like top quality<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 S&#8217;pose so. Where&#8217;d you get &#8217;em from anyway?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Down the market. No, I&#8217;m gonna make a killing on these you mark my words.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, if you say so Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I&#8217;d best get going, see you in class Boycie. Cheers for not marking me down late.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Anything for a mate Del-boy. Just you remember that favour.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, like you&#8217;d let me forget!<\/p>\n<p>EXT &#8211; School corridor a few moments later<\/p>\n<p>Del approaches the side entrance to the school. A bell<\/p>\n<p>rings and schoolchildren rush to and fro to get to class. Del quickens his step but is stopped in his<\/p>\n<p>tracks by two boys. One is tall and angular, he has outgrown his uniform, which looks as if it&#8217;s<\/p>\n<p>shrunk. The other is a lot shorter, his uniform is far too big. The former boy is fully composed. The<\/p>\n<p>latter appears ill-mannered and surly.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Del-boy!<\/p>\n<p>Del: Oh, watcha Danny.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: He doesn&#8217;t look all that pleased to see us, does he Tony?<\/p>\n<p>Tony: No, he don&#8217;t. He&#8217;s rushing off to the teachers!<\/p>\n<p>Del: I&#8217;ve got reception Tony.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Hardly seems right does it Tony? After all, we&#8217;ve been so looking forward to seeing him ain&#8217;t we?<\/p>\n<p>Del: I&#8217;ve been busy Danny.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Ah, how nice. Del&#8217;s becoming quite a scholar Tony?<\/p>\n<p>Tony: Where&#8217;s you briefcase then swatty?<\/p>\n<p>Tony pushes Del slightly. Del stands his ground but reservedly.<\/p>\n<p>Del: No, no. Not school. I&#8217;ve been working hard for a few bob. Me mum&#8217;s still not well. You know that Danny.<\/p>\n<p>Tony: Making a good few bob then Trotter!<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Tony, no! He&#8217;s doing the right thing by his family.<\/p>\n<p>Tony: He&#8217;s making a fortune. He&#8217;s got it all covered.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Ah yes, now that&#8217;s interesting, that&#8217;s what I&#8217;ve heard. Homework service, market trading, paper rounds!<\/p>\n<p>Del: We need the money! There&#8217;s mum and the baby, and you know what me dad&#8217;s like.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: You&#8217;re a credit to &#8217;em Del. All honest graft. We don&#8217;t want a penny of your money. Well earned!<\/p>\n<p>Del: Great. So I&#8217;ll just be getting off to\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Del makes to go but Danny signals to Tony who catches Del by the lapel and swings him back. He<\/p>\n<p>tears off his school cap, throws it on the floor, tramples it underfoot and kicks it away.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: (Coolly) I like doing plurals in English Del.<\/p>\n<p>Del: (Confused) Plurals?<\/p>\n<p>Danny:\u00a0 &#8216;Paper rounds&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Paper rounds?<\/p>\n<p>Danny: (Nods) Paper rounds. As in more than one.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Did you want one of me paper rounds Danny? Or I could put in a word at the\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Tony: He thinks we&#8217;re stupid!<\/p>\n<p>Danny: No, he don&#8217;t think that, do you Del?<\/p>\n<p>Del: No, no Danny. I don&#8217;t think that.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Del knows we wouldn&#8217;t go out delivering Heralds in the pissing rain at six in the morning, don&#8217;t you Del?<\/p>\n<p>Del: No, course you wouldn&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: That&#8217;s right, we leave it to the likes you to go out and do it. No, we don&#8217;t want a paper round, we want what comes with it Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del has an inkling of an idea of what they&#8217;re after but doesn&#8217;t volunteer it.<\/p>\n<p>Del: If it&#8217;s a question of dirty mags, I can probably\u2026.<\/p>\n<p>Tony: He does think we&#8217;re stupid!<\/p>\n<p>Danny: (looking hard at Del) I&#8217;m beginning to think he&#8217;s right Del.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Leave off! What?<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Two paper rounds!<\/p>\n<p>Del: So I got two, yeah, so what?<\/p>\n<p>Tony:\u00a0 Twice as many holidays.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: That&#8217;s right Tony; twice as many holidays. Twice as many newspaper cancellations, twice as many empty houses, isn&#8217;t that right Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del: So what?<\/p>\n<p>Danny: A simple Information service Del.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Oh, I see it now. You get to know who&#8217;s on holiday and how long they&#8217;re away for.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Right! Now you know we&#8217;re not stupid.<\/p>\n<p>Del: I never said you were.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: I&#8217;ll get straight to the point Trotter, three addresses.<\/p>\n<p>Del: You want three addresses?<\/p>\n<p>Danny: That&#8217;s right bright boy, three addresses. So it&#8217;s always fresh in your memory, we&#8217;ll give them a codename. Let&#8217;s call them Mum, Rodney and Grandad.<\/p>\n<p>Del: (Resigned to being compliant) When?<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Not in a rush Del, one a week. We&#8217;ll be calling.<\/p>\n<p>Tony: We&#8217;ll be calling!<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Yes. Though I&#8217;ll rephrase that. Tony will be calling.<\/p>\n<p>Tony: Yes. I&#8217;ll be calling. I&#8217;ll be calling &#8220;Mum!&#8221;, &#8220;Rodney!&#8221;, &#8220;Grandad!&#8221; Herherherher.<\/p>\n<p>Del watches Tony, carefully.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: That&#8217;s right Del, he will.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Yeah I know.<\/p>\n<p>Danny: Thank you Del. See you soon. (Looks at watch) Oh dear you&#8217;ve missed registration. Hurry along, don&#8217;t miss assembly now will you. I imagine you might need some catch-up with your prayers.<\/p>\n<p>Danny and Tony walk off. Del stands where he is, looking after them as they go. He shakes his head,<\/p>\n<p>picks his cap from the floor, dusts it down with his sleeve and walks into school.<\/p>\n<p>INT Evening &#8211; Nelson Mandella House<\/p>\n<p>Del is sitting at the dinner table, obviously pre-occupied and toying with his food. Grandad is<\/p>\n<p>watching the B&amp;W television.<\/p><div class=\"d7386eeb5bdcd2f43c1295b58ceaf130\" data-index=\"2\" style=\"float: none; margin:5px 0 5px 0; text-align:center;\">\n<script async src=\"\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js\"><\/script>\r\n<!-- ofah2-response -->\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-1609637348681190\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"5593259115\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"auto\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script>\n<\/div>\n\n<p>Del:\u00a0\u00a0 What&#8217;s this supposed to actually be anyway?<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Juke Box Jury. I like David Jason.<\/p>\n<p>Del: It&#8217;s Jacobs you soppy sod. Who&#8217;s David Jason? And I wasn&#8217;t talking about the tele, (looks at his dinner) I was referring to this mess here. I hope mum gets better soon!<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: You&#8217;re not too old for a clip round the ear you know.<\/p>\n<p>Del: (Looking over) Sorry Grandad, it&#8217;s not you. But what with Mum and everything.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad now looks at Del.<\/p>\n<p>Del: That ten-bob was supposed to be for groceries. He&#8217;ll not be back till they close now.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: You&#8217;re a good boy Del, your mum&#8217;s ever so proud of all you&#8217;re doing.<\/p>\n<p>Del: She&#8217;ll be alright, won&#8217;t she Grandad?<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Course she will.<\/p>\n<p>Del: (Shakes of sentiment, looks down at dinner for distraction) Anyway, what is this?<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Fish fingers.<\/p>\n<p>Del: (Holding one up on fork) Fish fingers? You could&#8217;ve taken it&#8217;s gloves off first Grandad!<\/p>\n<p>Doorbell rings.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Who&#8217;s that?<\/p>\n<p>Del: I don&#8217;t know do I. I bought a pair of them 3D specs a few years ago but I still ain&#8217;t got x-ray vision! Go an answer it.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Ow! I&#8217;m not going to see if it&#8217;s a hit or a miss now.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Go on, off you go, I&#8217;m busy unsoldering this fish finger look.<\/p>\n<p>Both smile. Grandad leaves to answer the door. Del works furiously with knife and fork.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad returns, ushering in the newcomer.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: It&#8217;s Trigger.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad gets back to the TV. Del looks up.<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Alright Del-boy?<\/p>\n<p>Del: Oh, hello Trig, fancy something to eat?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: No, you&#8217;re alright Del, I&#8217;ve just had tea at me Aunt Rene&#8217;s. She sent me over here.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Why? Rodney&#8217;s ok isn&#8217;t he?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Yeah, Dave&#8217;s fine. She just wanted you to know he&#8217;s being looked after and ask how your mum was. And see if you needed anything.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Mum&#8217;s all right, just a bit tired, she&#8217;s asleep at the moment. Thanks Trig, and thank Rene for us. We&#8217;re alright though, we don&#8217;t need nothing.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Unless you can help with the Driscoll brothers.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Grandad!<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Yeah, I heard about that, you&#8217;re in a bit of bother there Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Yes, thank you Trig, I realise that. Is there anything else you wanted or did you just come round to cheer me up?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Oh, yes Del-boy, there was something else<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Yeah?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Yes, I&#8217;ve been a bit short lately and I wondered if you wanted a hand with your homework service.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Bloody hell Trig you&#8217;ve only just learned how to read!<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Well it&#8217;ll be fresh in my head won&#8217;t it.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Hmmm, maybe. What&#8217;s your German like?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Depends. Frankfurters? Steins of beer?<\/p>\n<p>Del: No, not what they like, I meant what is your German li&#8230;Oh forget it. Here y&#8217;are, you can do this. (Tosses over a book) Geography?<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Who&#8217;s is it?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Slater&#8217;s.<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Great. How much?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 I&#8217;ll give you sixpence but do it properly. If you&#8217;re not sure use your encyclopaedias.<\/p>\n<p>Trigger looks blank<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 The books in your gran&#8217;s cabinet Trig. Reference books.<\/p>\n<p>Trig:\u00a0 Ah gotcha. Yeah, they&#8217;re good they are. Nice pictures.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Bloody hell, I hope I don&#8217;t regret this. I&#8217;ll give you your money when I get my next lot of paper round money. If the Driscoll&#8217;s don&#8217;t get me in trouble beforehand!<\/p>\n<p>Trig:\u00a0 Cheers. You gonna give the Driscoll&#8217;s a house number then?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 It&#8217;s not one number Trig, it&#8217;s three.<\/p>\n<p>Trig:\u00a0 Will you do it?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Might have to.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: You be careful Del-boy. You don&#8217;t want to end up the main suspect.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Me the main suspect? How do you work that one out?<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Look at the facts. Three houses get burgled. All three away on holiday and cancelled their papers. All three on your round.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Bloody hell, I hadn&#8217;t thought of that. I&#8217;d be done for.<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: Yeah, the newsagent will realise even if the law don&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Yes, and he&#8217;s got it in for me at the moment as well.<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: Yes, ever since you &#8220;plonker&#8221;ed up that new round of yours.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Once and for all Grandad, it was not my fault the papers got messed up! Hang about, that&#8217;s it!<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: What is?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Grandad, I think you&#8217;ve cracked it!<\/p>\n<p>Grandad: What? Cracked what?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Cracked the case. A bit of set-up and I reckon it&#8217;ll work.<\/p>\n<p>Trigger: What will?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 All in time you two, all in time. Now, let&#8217;s think how I&#8217;ll go about this!<\/p>\n<p>EXT Morning &#8211; Martin Luher King Comprehensive 3 days later<\/p>\n<p>Del is rushing, bounding along to school. Excited and breathless he sees Boycie at the school gates.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 I&#8217;ve done it Boycie, I&#8217;ve only done it!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: What&#8217;s that, broken the school record and turned up at hometime?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 No! Just now, they&#8217;ve both been nicked.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Who&#8217;s been nicked?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Who do you think? The Driscoll&#8217;s<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: What, the police have taken them? Here, you never told the cops which house they were robbing did you?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 No, of course not! What do you take me for? A grass?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: No. Don&#8217;t get the hump Del I only asked. So what happened?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 They robbed the wrong house.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: The wrong house, how come?<\/p>\n<p>Del: Yeah, 13 Ousden Drive I told them, they did 13 Ousden Close. It only turned out to be a copper&#8217;s place. Caught them shovelling all the silverware into the swag-bag as he came downstairs for his cornflakes.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Blimey, lucky for you Del-boy. Fancy the Driscolls getting the wrong address!<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Oh, it weren&#8217;t luck pal. Luck had nothing to do with it.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: No? How d&#8217;you make that out?<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 It&#8217;s Ousden Drive isn&#8217;t it!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: What about it?<\/p>\n<p>Del: It forks off into two doesn&#8217;t it, if you walk straight on you&#8217;d think you were still in\u00a0 Ousden   Drive but you&#8217;re actually in Ousden Close. There is a sign, but it&#8217;s unclear.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Well that makes two of us. I&#8217;m a bit unclear here myself!<\/p>\n<p>Del: Listen, doppy. Ousden Drive appears to go straight on with Ousden Close off\u00a0 to the right. But actually it&#8217;s the other way around.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: So you gave them Ousden Drive knowing they&#8217;d go the wrong way.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Exactly.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Bit chancy wasn&#8217;t it? You couldn&#8217;t guarantee they&#8217;d go the wrong way.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Actually I could. That&#8217;s what gave me the idea. My first day doing the papers down there I got them arse about face myself. I delivered all the wrong papers, the newsagent had a right go.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Still not foolproof.<\/p>\n<p>Del: No? I do the papers first thing in the morning. I&#8217;ve asked the milkman and the postman. And guess what? They both made exactly the same mistake when they first started.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: (Smiles) Enjoy it while it lasts Del, it&#8217;s only a temporary escape. I wouldn&#8217;t like to be in your shoes when the Driscolls get out.<\/p>\n<p>Del: Yeah? Who do you think will be writing to them while they&#8217;re inside, explaining about how they got the wrong house?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: You&#8217;ve got it all worked out haven&#8217;t you. All very good for Del-boy! What about their poor mum? You wouldn&#8217;t have even thought of that!<\/p>\n<p>Del: What do you take me for Boycie? I&#8217;ll see her all right for stuff while they&#8217;re away. She could do with a break from them anyway, they terrorise her. They terrorise all of us!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Yeah, well you&#8217;re not wrong there Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Haha, everyone&#8217;s a winner. It&#8217;s great how I always end up smelling of roses!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Well you&#8217;ll be smelling of roses in detention tonight Del-boy.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Leave it out Boycie, I know you would dob me in it!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: It&#8217;s gone twenty past Del, you&#8217;ve missed registration even. And it&#8217;s your second late this week. Nothing I can do about it.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Oh heck!<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Never mind, you won&#8217;t be on your own, there&#8217;ll be some company.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Oh yeah, who?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Slater.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Oh no, not Slater.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Yeah, something about his Geography homework apparently.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Oh, terrific! What could be worse?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Well, (looking down road) I reckon this could.<\/p>\n<p>Both look down road, an irate Denzil is marching determinedly, T-Shirt in hand.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: With all your excitement this morning you&#8217;ll have missed the American election result wouldn&#8217;t you Del. It was on the wireless this morning.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Eh?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Kennedy won by a landslide.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 What! He never did?<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Oh yes, so I think it&#8217;s a safe bet that our Liverpudlian friend here won&#8217;t be looking for\u00a0 you to offer his congratulations.<\/p>\n<p>Del:\u00a0 Blimey, this is going to require some of my best spiel.<\/p>\n<p>Boycie: Hahahahahahahahaha<\/p>\n<p>Del: Get stuffed Boycie. I can handle this, just you watch and learn. (Smiles and salutes Denzil enthusiastically as he approaches) Denzil my old mate! Just the very man I wanted to see&#8230;&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>THE END<\/p>\n<h2>Your Scripts<\/h2>\n<p>Would you like to write a script?<\/p>\n<p>Please make sure you follow our\u00a0guidlines to avoid disappointment as we will not\u00a0use any that don&#8217;t meet the criteria.<\/p>\n<p>Suggestion, if you have a PDA then why not drag the documents accross and read them next time you have a spare 10 mins.<\/p>\n<h2>Script\u00a0guidelines<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Please use the characters by John Sullivan (Del, Rodney, Trig Boycie etc) as the central characters<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Please write the script in the same way as others on this site (eg each line starts with the person speaking and a dot &#8220;Del.&#8221;)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Always keep your files as we may want to change one or two things and it will be easier if you have kept all versions.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Keep it clean and presentable as it&#8217;s a family show<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Make it funny, but believable<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<!--CusAds0-->\n<div style=\"font-size: 0px; height: 0px; line-height: 0px; margin: 0; padding: 0; clear: both;\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"125\" src=\"\" class=\"alignright wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>Prequal &#8211; Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning &#8211; Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school uniform (complete with cap) is strolling into the school gates. He whistles carelessly as he goes. Boycie:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. (Looks at watch) Ten past nine! Looks like [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-984","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-scripts"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Up there for thinking (Prequel)<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Up there for thinking (Prequel)\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@ofahnet\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@ofahnet\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"16 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61\"},\"headline\":\"Up there for thinking (Prequel)\",\"datePublished\":\"2010-01-04T20:29:32+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-02-10T12:56:44+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\"},\"wordCount\":3149,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\",\"articleSection\":[\"Scripts\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\",\"name\":\"Up there for thinking (Prequel)\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\",\"datePublished\":\"2010-01-04T20:29:32+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-02-10T12:56:44+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61\"},\"description\":\"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\",\"contentUrl\":\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Up there for thinking (Prequel)\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"Only Fools and Horses\",\"description\":\"Only Fools and Horses Appreciation Society\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61\",\"name\":\"admin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/9fbf7095d09bdf296986909afbe3c2cd?s=96&d=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ofah.net%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fthemes%2Fnewslog%2Fimages%2Fgravataricon.gif&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/9fbf7095d09bdf296986909afbe3c2cd?s=96&d=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ofah.net%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fthemes%2Fnewslog%2Fimages%2Fgravataricon.gif&r=g\",\"caption\":\"admin\"},\"description\":\"We are always looking for new writers on the Only Fools and Horses Society Web site - fancy joining the team and having your own authors box, read this to apply\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/fancy-writing-an-article\/\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/author\/admin\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)","description":"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_title":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)","twitter_description":"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school","twitter_image":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif","twitter_creator":"@ofahnet","twitter_site":"@ofahnet","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"admin","Estimated reading time":"16 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/"},"author":{"name":"admin","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61"},"headline":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)","datePublished":"2010-01-04T20:29:32+00:00","dateModified":"2017-02-10T12:56:44+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/"},"wordCount":3149,"commentCount":0,"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif","articleSection":["Scripts"],"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/","url":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/","name":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif","datePublished":"2010-01-04T20:29:32+00:00","dateModified":"2017-02-10T12:56:44+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61"},"description":"Prequal - Up there for thinking Download Script (63K) EXT Morning - Martin Luther King Comprehensive A youthful (15) Del-boy, dressed in grey school","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif","contentUrl":"http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/images\/script.gif"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/up-there-for-thinking-prequel\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Up there for thinking (Prequel)"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/","name":"Only Fools and Horses","description":"Only Fools and Horses Appreciation Society","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/6b387e74dbc5b2c3ecff7d00d2f80f61","name":"admin","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/9fbf7095d09bdf296986909afbe3c2cd?s=96&d=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ofah.net%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fthemes%2Fnewslog%2Fimages%2Fgravataricon.gif&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/9fbf7095d09bdf296986909afbe3c2cd?s=96&d=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ofah.net%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fthemes%2Fnewslog%2Fimages%2Fgravataricon.gif&r=g","caption":"admin"},"description":"We are always looking for new writers on the Only Fools and Horses Society Web site - fancy joining the team and having your own authors box, read this to apply","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/fancy-writing-an-article\/"],"url":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/author\/admin\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/984","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=984"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/984\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=984"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=984"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ofah.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=984"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}